The Married Seminar “I Choose Us” was organized for young couples within two regions (Ogba-Agege & Egbeda Regions) starting from Friday February 21, 2014 to Sunday February 23, 2014.
The facilitators took the couples through the different phases of marriage starting from Infatuation (which is the time of our early period of marriage that creates wonderful memories that help us later when life get challenging), Mutual Affection phase (which is the feeling of love for each other like the feelings between two siblings and if not properly nurtured could lead to disintegration), and the Love connection phase (that requires consistent effort of the couples to nurture the relationships, just like effort needed to stoke a fire). All the couples were encouraged to aspire to choose the Love Connection.
It was indeed a time of vulnerability as a practical stage of being vulnerable was displayed during the seminar. The couples could see the impact of expressing areas of weakness, needs and feelings respectively and apologizing if necessary. This is a new way that couples learnt to exploit in order to ensure that conflict does not arise in marriage.
The seminar was jointly attended by the young married couples in Ogba-Agege and Egbeda region and for older couples that became disciples within the last three years when the first section of “I Choose Us” was hosted by the lead evangelist in 2012.
The programme was anchored by Evangelist Kemi Olufowobi and his amiable wife, Nneka and Evangelist John Cawray and his better half Esther. 18 couples were in attendance and it was fully interactive as everyone shared their different experiences in marriage.
Several video clips were shown to expose harmful behavioral patterns in marriage which could result to conflict and should be jettisoned. In the seminar, couples came to understand that for wives to feel love and respect, husbands need to be a considerate listeners, responsible leaders and romantic lovers. Also wives should appreciate and admire, initiate and enter his world.
The “I Choose Us” was drawn from the scriptures with credible research and practical life experiences that could help everyone to build a strong, healthy and vibrant marriage.
With the help of the questionnaires, the facilitators gave valuable insights into unhealthy thinking patterns called life traps (schema). Rather than relying on ineffective communication and behavior that invariably leads to the vortex of conflict escalation, the facilitators were able to help couples to see how to break harmful cycles, and avoid hurtful coping styles as they practice vulnerability and forgiveness.
Responses extracted from some couples showed that the training was quite relevant at this time in their marriage as some of them commented on many of the eye opening issues mentioned in the seminar.
The seminar also helped to exposed some of the areas in our marriages that required disciplining. Calls were received immediately after the seminar to express appreciation and some questions raised was fully explained for better understanding.
There will be a quick follow up and feedbacks on all the couples that attended the seminar to ensure that the three day intensive programme reflects positive impact in our marriages.
Watch out for testimonies that will abound in our marriages as a result of this great seminar “I Choose Us”.
God bless you.
Mr & Mrs Chibuzor Sunny Uwagboi
Married Coordinator, Ogba-Agege region